Driving is a privilege that drives many children of aging parents to distraction.

We were horrified by the recent Santa Monica tragedy in which an 86-year-old man plowed through an outdoor market, killing 10 and injuring dozens. And just days later in Encanto, the accident in which a 76-year-old woman lost control of her car and crashed into an unoccupied house, demolishing the living room.

Do children of aging parents bear the blame for these kinds of accidents? Is it up to us to repossess the car keys when it's time? How do we know when? And who will step in if we're unsuccessful?

We need help. We know it's past time for mandatory annual road testing, yet we cringe at the thought.

Locking them out of their cars could ruin the lives of our parents, whose wheels symbolize independence and freedom – and dignity. So, adult children often demur, praying the folks won't end up injuring themselves or, worse, someone else.

I know the feeling. My late father refused to give up driving, long after he was forgetting where he wanted to go or how to get there. When my sister and I finally sold his Buick from under him, he climbed into bed and refused to get out. The loss might not have caused his deep depression, but it certainly contributed to it.

It's time

Our decision to dump the car was tough, but necessary. The statistics back us up. The California Department of Motor Vehicles reports, when rates are adjusted for mileage, the youngest and oldest have the highest crash rates per person per mile. Crash rates rise dramatically after age 79.

Even so, the Senate failed to pass Tom Hayden's 1999 bill to require road tests for older drivers. I wonder if the failure had anything to do with us boomers who, if truth be told, don't really want to face the testing ourselves.

Sure, we all know older people who are wonderful drivers who, apparently, have learned to compensate for slowing reflexes and other nuisances of age. Some of my older, safe-driver friends tell me they'd welcome annual testing after 70 or 75.

My friends who are a danger behind the wheel, though, detest the possibility, admitting – in confidence – they're likely to fail the tests.

Duh!

No doubt, it would be expensive to test so many so often. But we can't afford not to.

Maybe, we could use simulators, similar to those used for pilots, to save time and money. Perhaps, the private driving schools could take over the preliminary testing, sending only the questionable drivers on to DMV.

AARP tells us we can't discriminate against the elderly, but it's dead wrong. In this case it's OK to treat people differently. We don't let children drive, do we? Speaking of which, it wouldn't hurt to require teenagers to renew their licenses yearly.

But – and I'm wearing my big, floppy elderly advocate's hat now – we cannot in full conscience start taking away licenses until we beef up alternative transportation, making it substantially more available and accessible and timely.

We need more taxi-voucher programs. It also makes sense to begin training younger people as personal drivers, and to make their insurance more affordable. How about scooter lanes on all roads, so older people could run their own errands?

There's plenty we can do when we decide it's time.

And with baby boomers beginning to cross the 55-yard line, the clock is ticking.

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